Have Baby, Will Charge

Today we discovered one of the hidden perks of havning a baby: Instant popularity!

This morning, feeling brave, my husband and me decided to go to the site of the national arts festival currently held in our hometown. This week-long festival includes lots and lots (and lots) of stalls with artsy stuff to see and buy, and lots of stages erected on which to hold shows with lots of chairs on which to sit and watch said shows.

So there we were, innocently thinking we'd be walking along the stalls with the baby in the stroller, enjoying the sights. Hah! We were soon shown the error of our naiveté, for walking through the massed crowds, it seemed that we were the sights. We couldn't walk two steps without being confronted by one (or more) crooning person (mostly female, though there was this weird moment with a teenage boy...) who wanted to drool all over our baby.

These people look completely normal, and I'm sure that were you to ask the people who know them, they'd be said to act perfectly normal as well. However, it seems that for some people, the sight of a baby is evidently a cue to become weird and, quite frankly, sometimes a little scary. Our baby was an instant celebrity, drawing crowds larger than some of the established artists preforming on the stages!

So, we decided that next year, we'll set up a tent and charge people to come in and look at the baby (any touching will cost extra). We'll do this in order to cash in on one of the other hidden perks of having children: Making money.

A Wasted Weekend...

Ah, Sunday. Don't you just love Sundays? It is the day [insert preferred deity here] made to just kick back, relax, take stock of the past week's goings-on and rest before the new week dawns. A day of peace, calm and bumming out in front of the TV in a mindless stupor. That is, everywhere but here, it seems.

Yes, the Princess has been discovering that the world is, in fact, rather interesting. This happened to our immense chargin and against all our wishes, as we were hoping to keep her locked up inside the house forever, banning all contact with the outside world, squashing all interest in going out and especially going out with boys. Alas, now our plan has failed and a new one must be formed.

So, since Princess discovered that the world is so amusing she has also evidently been drawing the conclusion that all the most interesting and amusing things about the world are hidden away until the moment she closes her eyes to sleep. Hence, she refuses to sleep during the day in fear of missing out on all these things her parents (us) wanted her to miss. Drats, foiled again!

Ah well. I guess we'll just have to spend the next few days dreaming up a new strategy and in the meantime I think I'll just tear out my hair in sleepless frustration live with it.

Blogs I am soooo over

This is my humble take on blogs that I'm soooo over.

5. Blogs written from a pet/child's point of view. I mean, really. It was cute in the beginning, but now every second blog is like this it's getting old real fast.
4. Blogs that are actually advertisements disguised as blogs. Waste my time, why don't you? That seriously ticks me off.
3. Blogs reporting the same old news, the same as seven hundred thousand others. Need I say more?
2. Bad poetry blogs. Like, totally over it when I was 16 man, while th'moon speeks 2 me

and finally, my #1 pet peeve blog:

Blogs that go on and on about nothing but American politics, as if the entire world revolves around America and its politics.

Now I don't have a problem with a well thought out political opinion, or some ranting about the crap the government does, but these blogs that every day give the same thought voiced differently about the same old same old just makes me tired. Politics, politics, all the time politics makes blogs dull, especially if it's politics that have nothing to do with me or my life here in South Africa, where we have problems that make American problems seem like picnics. Honestly.

But then, that's just me.

My Dirty Little Secret.

Okay, I'll admit it: I'm a child at heart. I guess that's why I get along with kids so well, but that's besides the point. I'm totally *addicted* to Neopets. There you have it. My dirty little secret.

For those of you who've been living in a virtual vacuum these past few years, here's the 411. Neopets is a virtual pet site that allows you to adopt up to 4 virtual pets. Then you have to play games and/or do things around the site to earn virtual money (Neopoints) which you use to buy food and toys to keep your pets happy. However, for most people, Neopets is about collecting stuff, making galleries in which to show off these stuff and so on. I'm totally hooked! For me at least, the main aim of Neopets is to
a.) Collect as many Neopoints as I can and
b.) Collect as many avatars as I can.

I spend hours every day playing Neopets, and right now, trying to figure out the latest plots. I'm telling you, if you're bored, head on out to Neopia and sign yourself a Neopets account today. You'll either love it or you'll hate it, but if their popularity is anything to go by, loving it seems to be the main response.

Wake me up when September ends...

It's been such a long time since I've actually had the time to blog! I tell ya, they don't tell you in the manual how much time a newborn takes up!

Anycase, here I am, crazier than ever thanks to having to wake every 2 hours whenever I try to sleep.

So I was up at 2-3am Monday morning and saw most of the Emmy Red Carpet arrivals on E!, since we are so far ahead time-wise, and my goodness, didn't Jennifer Garner look smashing? I think she's just the most beautiful of all the Hollywood Jens out there. And then there's Heidi Klum, wearing that incredible Dior gown! Wow! If I was a star and could have a 24 hour nanny who'd raise my kids, I'd be out to the Emmy's 6 days after giving birth as well! (Though I imagine sitting all night wouldn't have been a ball...)

Speaking of babies, I see the Speaderline had arrived. It's a boy, apparently named Preston. WHAT? That's NOT a celebrity baby name! You should have named him something like Brittin (that's a combination of Brittney and Kevin, don't you know?, and it's a tryndee spelling)! Ah well, I still say in 15 years, when the Children of the Stars take over the world, we'll regret this era.

Ooh, the baby is up, I gots to go.

It's the Bomb

Need I say more? All credit goes to Stidy, over at News24. Some of the best cartoons I've ever seen, I've seen over there.

Presenting to the world...

Logan Mika van der Merwe. Born 28 July 2005, weighing 2,670 Kgs (that's 5.9 lbs).

She surprised us by arriving 3 weeks early, and looking at her now, two weeks on, I find it so difficult to believe that she should still have been in the womb, biding her time and floating in her own little Nirvana of water and muffled sounds, instead of out here in the harsh, cold world.

She's such a little character! She gets plenty angry when she can't get her food (we've been having a bit of trouble with the feeding, but it seems to be better now), and she doesn't want to go to sleep, she wants to see what's going on all the time.

Her eyes are so active all the time, like she can't drink in everything fast enough, and I want to tell her: Slow down, little one, you have the entire rest of your life for that! Then I remember, none of us know how long we have, so I say nothing. I just hold her closer and thank all the gods that she arrived safe and has a chance to experience life and I have a chance to experience her, a chance so many other mothers and babies don't have.

An Early Arrival

I know I haven't been around in a while, but visiting my grandparents while I still had the chance before baby came, since we didn't want to travel too close to my due date.

Damn you, Irony!

Well.

As you guys know, I was 37 weeks pregnant on Wednesday. So Wednesday evening I got in bed late, as usual, and awoke two hours later (about 12:30 Thursday morning)... and my water had broken!

I'll tell y'all the whole story (with pics, I promise) later or tomorrow, but suffice to say that Logan Mika van der Merwe entered the world at 19:10 Thursday, 28 July at 37 weeks 1 day of age. She is soooooo tiny! She only weighed 2,67 kgs. That's 5,9 lbs, for those of you not on the metric system.

Although she's 3 weeks premature, she's absolutely fine, no problems whatsoever, and we came home from the hospital today. She's such a little beauty, though we do have some trouble feeding sometimes.

But I must say, I'm still STUNNED. We weren't expecting her for at least another 3 weeks, and even then I thought she'd be late as she's a first baby.

Isn't it the best surprise ever? I just thought I'd let you all know.

Religion and the Unsharkly Shark

For those of you wondering where I have been, the answer is simple: I've been visiting my grandparents for the last time before the baby arrives. While there, something curious happened, which I must confess, left me puzzled and very angry.

I had a conversation with my aunt about the movie "Shark Tale". I quite liked the movie, but she said that she was disgusted with it, because of the shark wanting to dress like a dolphin and not being "sharkly" enough, and the parallels it has to those of homosexual persuasion. She detested that the movie advocated that everyone get along, even sharks who aren't "sharkly", because it teaches kids that it's okay to be friends with someone who's "not normal", or even to *be* "not normal". This, she said, was not something she wanted to teach her kids.

I then pointed out (politely enough, actually, though it makes me mad when people are so short sighted) that we can't afford to teach our kids anything else in the world we live in, even if we don't agree (which I do), since they are the ones who'll have to function in a society where it's criminal to discriminate. She then said: "But it's against what the Bible says" (which, by the way, is an entirely different debate).

This got me to thinking, and after chewing on it for a long time, I concluded that most of the world's evils can be blamed on the concept of organized religion, no matter what religion we're talking about. It's the reason behind most wars, most terrorism, and most stupidity. Honestly. That whole concept of "My religion requires it from me" has been modified to "My church/fellow worshippers would expect it from me".

That's what horrifies most "religious" people about something like a pregnant unmarried: not so much the fact of the pregnancy and its implications, or even the failure to conform to the religion, but "What will the X's think", "What will the church say", "How can I ever look the neighbours in the face again".

And that just makes me sad. People who spend most of their time and energy judging others and wondering who'll go to Heaven or Nirvana or wherever, and losing sight of the actual religion and the actual deity they worship in the process.

I guess that's why I'm so agnostic. No religion, no rules, just pure spirituality. Besides, I'm such a rebel, I don't think rules and me were made to co-exist in any case.

The safety of hospitals...

Now, everyone who knows me, know that I have a very vested interest in what goes on in hospitals, especially since I have to go to one to have my baby soon (I wanted a home birth, but there are no midwives experienced in HB in a 50 mile radius from where I live).

About three or four weeks or so ago, the first reports of babies (started at 7, and soon it was up to 19, final death toll was 22 newborn babies) dying in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) of a Durban Hospital, the Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, due to a strange illness. Read more about the initial report here.

Since Durban is one of the largest cities in the country, this was distressing in itself, but over the weekend, the results of an investigation launched were made public. In the investigation it was found that the outbreak was due to unsanitary and unhygenic practises in the hospital, dirty equipment and the like. 22 babies are dead because the hospital was unsanitory, giving the babies contaminated and infected bottles, IVs etc.

22 Newborn babies. Dead. I simply can't get over it.

Then you get those people who look at you and say: "But you are placing your baby's life in danger if you have a home birth", while the truth, according to science and scientific studies, is that a home birth (adhering to certain rules of safety, of course) is at least as safe or safer than a hospital birth. And this is in industrialized nations where hospitals are more hygenic, sanitary and staffed than they are here.

Then some people wonder why I get all angry! I wonder what they'd do if I walked up to the "hospital birth club", who insist that anyone who wants to give birth at home doesn't deserve to have a baby, and said: "It is scientifically proven that home birth is as safe or safer than hospital, and that's in countries like America, where the hospitals are clean for the most part. Who's putting their babies' lives more at risk: me who would choose to birth safely at home, following the "safety rules", or you, who go to a place that's proven to be more dangerous?"

Of course I would never do that, since I believe all women's choices are their own and has nothing to do with me, but I wish that they'd lay off me about my choices! I wish that I could have found a midwife who was experienced at home births and had my baby at home. And I hope, hope, hope, that nothing like what happened in Durban happens in the hospital where I'll have my baby. What else is there to do?

Saturday Night Potjie

Since it's Saturday night, and neither my husband nor me felt like cooking per se (we rarely do, come to think of it), he decided to invite some friends over to make a potjie (pronounced POY-kee). This is basically a stew made in a three-legged cast iron pot cooked over an open fire. See picture to get the idea.

Now, first of all, you must understand that this is not only a valued traditional dish, it's something of a ritual in itself. First, all the ingredients should be chopped as rougly and unevenly as possible. Then the fire is lit (in this case, at 6pm) and the Great Wait starts. The fire can't be too hot when you put the pot on, or the food will burn, see. So, after it is ascertained that the fire is ready (usually a few beers in, especially with it being Saturday, Rugby Day, but none of us drink or watch rugby), the pot is placed over the fire and the veggies and meat and stuff is added layer by layer in a secret way that is passed down from potjie-maker to potjie maker.

The reason potjiekos is so popular in South Africa is not entirely because of its unique and delicious taste, but also because of the good times and social behaviour associated with it. What makes potjiekos so unique, is that no two potjie's ever taste the same, the taste is decided upon by the chef and what ingredients he wants to put into it.

The ingredients are not to be stirred until the pot is ready to be eaten (after about 2 or so hours on the fire), and it's served with some rice. Hmm. Now I'm starving. And best of all, I don't have to do anything... besides wash the dishes afterwards.

On second thought, maybe I should complain to someone...

The War of the Mentally Unstable.

I've decided to not be just another news-commentary blog, but I simply can't resist mouthing a few words about Tom Cruise and his denial of the therapy currently in use for the treatment of mental illnesses. (For those who don't know, I'm about as unstable as they come, and have to use anti-deps even though I am pregnant). As if that wasn't enough, he went on to attack Brooke Shields for using anti-depressants and therapy to deal with her post-natal-depression.

Brooke defended herself and called his claims "ridiculous, as reported in this article here.

This just left me wondering: does the wonderful Mr. Cruise have talents/anatomical parts as yet unheard of? Some sort of qualification or research to back up his claims, or more pertinantly, some experience in PND? I would have loved to see him eat his words after he suffers from it, but since his kids are adopted and he himself can't exactly carry, give birth and suffer the hormonal fluctuations that pregnancy and children bring, I can't help but wonder where he gets the right to make statements like that and present it as truth on international TV.

Of course, everyone's entitled to their own opinions about things like this, but honestly, it's just stupid to open your mouth on international TV, commenting on things about which you know absolutely nothing but what your church tells you.

Perhaps we should put Telkom on his back and see him deny his own mental instability after months of trying to reason with them and get some form of service from them. Now that would be entertaining.

Damn the Man!

WARNING: Rant ahead.

This is life in South Africa. We have one, yes one single, telecomunications company, named Telkom (see telephone on image). Since they have no competition, they simply screw us with telephone call prices and internet pricing, because we have nowhere else to go. Example: Since we have nowhere else to get internet access from (not talking ISP here, talking actual lines and whatnot, all the hardware stuff you need), they simply charge us something like 300-500% of what other countries charge, and you still have to pay them for the telephone line usage and ISP services.

Then, 2-3 years ago, they finally brought out DSL connections, to the joys of many, since phone-bills were through the roof. Now you can pay a fixed amount (still costing something like $200) for "unlimited access". The catch: you are only allowed 3 Gig of bandwidth usage, uploads and downloads. For those of you, like me a few months ago, with no clue about what this is, it means you can only surf/download a (very) limited amount.

No one can do anything about it, because they are The Man, and The Man calls the shots. Any other company that wants to come into the game has to either lay out an incredible amount of capital, or use Telkom's lines, and be subjected to Telkom's pricing.

As if that wasn't bad enough, their simple call service is still somehting like 300% more than the rest of the world has to pay, analysts say. I haven't actually sat and worked out how much different countries charge for their calls, so I'll take their word for it.

New Layout!!

I designed my very own layout! Yay for me! What do y'all think? Please don't hesitate to tell me, even if you don't like it, as I'm dying to know what others think. I've spent the last three days on it, sleeping almost nothing, and now I'm soooo tired, I think I'm going to go directly to bed, without passing go.

Also, please let me know if there are any problems in the display of the layout! I've tested it to work in both Internet Explorer and Mozilla, but you never know what bugs are lurking around.

The quest for the perfect layout

I am not one who believes in posting just for posting's sake, so this post actually has a point. I've been looking around, trying to find the perfect layout or the perfect picture for the perfect layout. I'll try out a few, which will probably take some time to code, so I'll not be posting too often, but please let me know what you think about the layout whenever you happen to drop in!

A rose by any other name...

So, I've been away for a week or so, visiting family etc. In that time, what struck me is how people react to the name you have chosen!

Take me, for instance. Hubby and me have decided, since before we knew what it was, that if it was a girl, her name would be Logan. Yes, I know in America it's a terrible name, but here in South Africa it's really wonderful. Names are cultural, you know. You'd almost never met an American named Bongani or Siyabonga, yet these are two very common names here. So keep that in mind before you offload on me on how it is a boy's name. Just because that's the way it is where you live doesn't make it the way it is here where I live.

Anyway, my family frowns on it (or that's the impression I get) because it's not "Afrikaans" enough, if you can believe it! Now I'd be the first to admit that our surname is pretty much the definition of a traditional, Afrikaans surname. Which is why I want our baby to have an English first name that's easily pronouncable in Afrikaans too. Only thing is, no one in my family seems to "get" that!

Ah well, luckily they had their chance to name their kids, now it's my turn, bwhahaha.

Now it may seem to some that I'm obsessed with the "name" thing, but it's getting pretty important, seeing as how we're already in week 32 of the pregnancy!

Anyway, for a middle name we're (by which I mean I am) considering either "Danielle" or "Gabrielle". Not Daniella, or Gabriella, since those are too "Afrikaans" (and too long, our surname's a mouthfull). Both of those are names that I would have liked as first names, but Logan is the only one hubby and me can agree on, so Logan it is.

Of course, my naming worries are absolutely nothing compared to the problems the US government has with that spy plane that went down! Maybe I should name the baby Roswell, and give the US government something else to deny.

Letters from the edge of the known universe

Hah. Can I tell you a story of drugs, anger, one husband almost loosing what I'm sure he'd consider to be essential equipment, the trauma....

Wait, let me start at the beginning. After a long, well-deserved rest, I am back and blogging. Lots to blog about tonight, sadly, lacking the incentive to do so. Tired tired tired.

Wait, this is a long story.

After weeks of procrastination by my darling husband, I finally got him to commit that we'd be starting our 8-week pre-natal classes tonight. Hubby says ok, I've been nagging since March, but whatever.

So then it turns out that there are no more classes! The ladies presenting it are going on holliday and will resume only in August. Now, my due date is mid-August, and these are the only classes in my area, so basically, I'm screwed.

I feel so angry at my dh. If we could have started when I asked him, in JANUARY, we wouldn't be having this problem!

What makes me that saddest is that I was really looking forward to meeting other moms-to-be, since I don't know any! *Wail wail*

So, upon hearing that classes only resume in August, and that it's due to my dh that we still hadn't joined, I was FURIOUS and took some calming pills that my psychiatrist game me for situations like that. Now I'm feeling less angry, but very tired and groggy, which is the point, I guess.

Well, it seems like, having failed again and again, as I have, should not be seen as failure by these bold astronomers: They claim to have found another planet with very earth-like characteristics, and are convinced that finding a planet like earth is just a matter of time.

Good, I say, for then we can move Micheal Jackson to that planet and have world peace once more.

The Yuneek Alphabet

Tryndee parents suck, and they should all be made to wear the names they make their kids wear. I'm sorry, I just had to say that. Inserting Y's everywhere (would you like y's with that?), misspelling the simplest names, missing the fact that words actually have *meanings* and are not just a collection of sounds...

I was reading the forums over at the Bad Baby Names place, and this is actually a name, apparently:
Abcd: Feminine, pronounced absidee.

Then of course, there are the parents who are paid money by a certain online casino, to name their children goldencasinodotcom. I kid you not.

What are people thining? Naming children is a sacred responsibility, not a joke or a for-laughs game! Ugh!

And don't even get me started on Nevaeh. It's supposed to be "Heaven" backwards, but how the hell do you pronounce it, and can't you just see the joke? "Oh yah, she was "heaven" *snigger snigger*".

At least the namers of Nevaeh, or the majority of them, anyways, don't claim that their names are "yuneek".

But it's genetic!

The news today is just buzzing with the newest research, done on pairs of female twins by the St Thomas's hospital in London. In their report, it is found that "between 34 and 45 percent of the variation in the ability to orgasm" can be blamed on genetics.

I must say, the article was quite engrossing, and does make a lot of sense... but can't you just imagine it? "Oh, my inability to orgasm (like my inability to stop eating) is genetic, nothing they can do...". Heh.

In other twin-related news, a woman who has received an ovary transplant (with her identical twin as donor) delivered her baby without complications, after conceiving just a few months after the surgery, and the drs are saying that she can have more babies. Yay for her!

The pot-issue has been referred to congress, with the hopes of coming to a conclusion that would lead to similar control as there is currently over things like cocaine and morphine, which are used for medical purposes but are illigal to use recreationally. My personal opinion is that *all* drugs should be banned from "recreational" use, but hey, that's just me. I'm sure a lot of valiumed Pretoria princesses would disagree.

I'm watching the Mac-InTel epic with interest, because it could mean an end to windows. Anything that combats the evil of the Gatekeeper and his team of wanton scientists seeking to clam the entire world in the tyrannical chains of materialistic computering gets my vote! (Says the user of a home pc which runs AMD and Windows XP).

Then, of course, there's the omnipresent African Aid issue. Well, it's omnipresent here in Africa, at least. Apparently the British are welcoming their Prime Minister's convincing US president Bush to give Aid to Africa. Isn't that a catchy slogan? Aid to Africa's AIDs problem. I think I should copyright that!

Locally, that slimy SOB Shaik was sentenced to only 15 years in jail. For those of you who are not from South Africa, he is the owner of some companies who, together with our present vice-president and future president, Jacob Zuma, commited major and gross corruption in the South African Arms deal, robbing the country/state of millions.

He should have been locked away for life, along with his buddy Mr. Future President Zuma if you ask me, but hey. At least it's better than nothing, and they're deciding whether to proscute that corrupt Zuma. I swear, if he becomes president of this country, I will seriously consider fleeing. Can't you just imagine the dimensions corruption would take on *then*? I could just hear it now: "Yeah, we thought corruption was a problem in 2005. *laughter all around*". Shudder.

Then, in China, the Chinese government requires all blog-users, companies etc. to register or be shut down. All of this in a desperate attempt to control the internet. I can't decide wether this is hilarious or sad. "Open up! This is the Net Police, and you haven't registered that blog!" Bloggist types furiously to summon help online, while police shout "Don't do that! You can't type without a license! You bad, bad man/woman!"

Sad, I fear.

Of course, the whole world is trying to guess what Britney Spears is carrying... for some strange reason, they are mainly concerned about it being a boy or girl, with the latest verdict being pink. I just can't understand it. Why aren't people more concerned with *what* she is carrying? A future bad pop-song-singing autograph-signing-while-bitching little Spederline! The world as we know it could come to an end, with grinning celeb kids being responsible for the fact, and all people are concerned about is "Is it a boy or a girl?"

At least, if its a girl, she can tell Ricki, Jerry and everyone else "Well, my mother says she had her first orgasm after she married... but I've been orgasming since before I can remember. Where does that leave me? It's genetic, you know!"

Insomnia and the Edge of Madness

I've been having the most trouble with insomnia this past week! I just can't fall asleep. I'd roll around, and still be awake at 3, 4, even 5 am. That was all good, because since I'm such a lazy bum, I don't have anywhere to go or anything to do, so I can sleep until 2pm if I so wish. However, lately I've been waking 9-ish, and couldn't get back to sleep! Argh!

"They" say that it might actually be preparation for the sleepless nights to come, but I simply can't see that being so big a problem for me. I'm very privileged, and won't have to work or do anything except take care of Logan, so I should be able to sleep during the day, when she does, right? Or am I just deluded?

Anyway, I'm just too tired to do anything constructive in terms of writing today. I think I'm going to crawl into bed with some Chamomile/Lavender tea and my favourite book of all time, Tigana, and leave the heavy cogitation for someone who actually would be able to do it.

For tonight, at least.